Sunday, September 9, 2012

Getting Out of My Own Head

Exactly 4 weeks and 6 days from today, I will be sitting on my couch hopefully feeling very proud that I accomplished my goal of 13.1 miles.  The training has been tough and I won't lie, there have been some serious rough patches.  Part of these patches are straight up lazy on my part, but there is an equal part of not having enough time in the day.

Training was going great during the summer months.  I would be sure to hit the road before my husband went to work.  Then reality struck me in the face... school started again and I found myself not wanting to wake up at 5am to go for a run.  Getting two kids ready for school is exhausting and when I come home from school, the last thing I want to do is tie up the laces.  I've sadly skipped too many of the short runs but tried to keep my pace on the longer Saturday runs... Then came yesterday.

I hit a super lazy patch.  I ran 7 miles two weeks ago and then ran a 5k the next day.  All this fit into my training schedule.  Schools started and a ended up skipping two weeks of running.  So on Saturday, I decided that I needed to hit my scheduled 9 miler, after not having done anything.  This is not a good idea.  I hit mile 6 and BAM! I stopped.  Now the funny thing is that I wasn't tired.  Nothing hurt.  I was actually headed to a downhill section of my run.  My brain stopped, I could run another step.  I walked the rest of the way home and went through every emotion.  How was I going to run 13.1 when I could finish 9?  Why was I doing this?  Do I really even like to run?  Why do I care?  Why did I stop?

It all came to one major realization... If I wanted this, really wanted this, I have to let go of the excuses. I can run 13.1 miles, I know I can.  But will I torture myself by not preparing myself and struggling every step?  Or will I decide that I'll commit to the training and do this right?

Here's to the next 4 weeks and 6 days...

xoxo -k.

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